Question: Did Lynyrd Skynyrd's keyboard player die?

Answer: Yes, that must be why Goatdiapers hasn't posted shit today. Let me tell you what he is doing. He is currently sobbing with his aunt Bessie-Sue over a tub of tater salad and case of Bud Heavy while wearing his Ronnie Van Zant T-Shirt. I ask that your prayers be with the Diapers family over this truly horrific loss.

Question: Is Jessica Simpson a tubby slut now?

Answer: To call her a "tubby slut" would be an understatement. This bitch has lost all control... Either that or Gomer's seed has been running wild in all the wrong places. With those tacky-ass clothes and all the weight, she looks like goatdiapers' aunt Bessie-Sue now after a 12 pack of Bud Heavy and a 5 gallon bucket of tater salad before she throws horse shoes and competes in the watermelon seed spitting contest at the Diapers family reunion. It goes without saying that I would now not poker.org.