Question: Jerry, who would you take in a jailhouse brawl, OJ or Plaxico? - Ryan/ Nashville, TN

Answer: Thank you Ryan for your submission. You have inspired me to start a segment known as "Jailhouse brawls". Today will be my very first installment so without further ado, I would definitely take OJ and let me explain why:

1. In the hypothetical "all time players" fantasy football draft, I would trade Goatdiapers this: Plaxico and Laurence Maroney for OJ and Erik Dickerson. Thus, GD would have ole dead leg Plaxico and my OJ would rush for 2,000 yards and I would win. (true story)

2. If you asked me who would be the first to kill himself, then I would take Plaxico all day.

3. The HIV's favorite football team is the Giants and anybody associated with the New York football pussies is a loser.

4. OJ the butcher don't play and he is practicing in the clink right now with a shank that he carved from a toothbrush.

Question: Now that Ray Ray is a free agent, do you think that he will sign with the Cowboys?

Answer: I don't think, I know. Yeah I understand that he's kind of fat now and he has his own version of the pee pee dance but bottom line, he will MURDER some running backs with a star on his helmet next season.