Question: What kind of websites does B3KR like to look at?

Answer: Luckily today I walked by his desk and noticed he was reading the wikipedia entry of one of his favorite celebrities, check it out. Of course the Subaru website is a favorite as well as this one.

I invite/dare B3KR to challenge any of these.

Question: What happens if you drive a Subaru and it starts raining?

Answer:

Question: Is the chin strap/ leprechaun/ amish beard cool?

Answer: Hell no but there's this dude at work that rocks one like an Amish dude in a House of Pain video in 1993.

Photo courtesy of: http://www.uncoached.com/category/the-myspace-toolbox/ Check it out.

P.S. He still rocks the Big Ole Timbos too.

Question: How big of a loser is B3KR?

Answer: I contacted Professor Bunsen for help with this question. He provided me a formula to use that will determine the percentage of chance you are a huge fucking loser douchenozzle.














For B3KR we plug in the following values:
------------------------------------------
e = 47
n = 6
s = 2
d = 20
Z = 562
L = 16

and we come up with:



So it looks like B3KR has a 99.74% chance of being a huge loser.

P.S. Pro Bunsen stressed to me that this formula will not work for anyone other than B3KR because they would have zeros for every variable.

Question: Is there a story floating around the Internet that references Noodle Arm's nuts?

Answer: Yep

Be sure to pick up this shirt to show your support.

Question: Is it chauncey poll time yet?

Answer: Damn right it is. Here's how it works. I'm going to pose a question with multiple choices. Put in your selection or write-in on the comments section.

TODAY'S TOPIC:
GoatDiapers is starting a new website about himself and he wants help naming it. I've come up with a few options. Tell me what you think.

1. My RSS feed is longer than the Economic Stimulus package and I still have the sack to tell everybody that I work my ass off.
2. Nick Saban's taint tastes like cotton candy.
3. If the Tide got into a fight with God, BAMA would win in the first round.
4. My wife makes me give her a MANI-PEDI every night and that's why I don't play XBOX anymore.
5. I wish I was Freddie Kitchens.
6. If Nickelback was an all-you-can-eat buffet, I would weigh 824 pounds.
7. I got my virginity back as of yesterday.
8. I don't have a favorite pro-team but I fucking hate yours.
9. Caddy said that Hunter Cantwell was at one time highly touted and I took that as him saying "I think Hunter Cantwell is the best quarterback/person/deity/frog-gigger in the world."
10. War and Saban
11. The Catcher and the Saban
12. The Holy Saban
13. Of Mice and Saban
14. Moby Saban
15. 1000 leagues up Saban's ass

Answer: Is B3KR a sports fan?

Answer: Apparently, he likes basketball.

Question: Which band has/had the hottest members?

Answer: According to Black Caddy the answer is:


I don't agree with him. Do you?

Question: Does any proof exist that Barry "NoodleArm" Bonds juiced?

Answer: Why, hells yeah!!!

Question: If Black Cadillac sees you walking towards the elevator will he hold it for you?

Answer: No, because he is a douche nozzle.

Question: Did somebody actually take a picture of Michael Phelps rippin' tubes?

Answer: Fuck yeah. What an idiot. If I worked at Hardees making biscuits and gravy for a living, I wouldn't let people take pictures of me toking on a 3 footer for fear of losing my job or going to jail. Nevermind that ole trap jaw makes millions off of endorsements. I'll be glad when this dildo is done winning gold medals so we don't have to hear about him anymore and he can smoke his bong in peace.

Question: What is the first concert of the year for Diapers going to be?

Answer: The fuckin' bar-chord wonders themselves. He's going to put his Kroeger shirt on and stand on the front row with 3 dozen roses in anticipation of throwing them at Chad. He'll be sporting wood while all jacked up on Motts Applejuice boxes. This will make Nickelback show number 59 for Diapers.

Question: Coachella's lineup fucking finally came out. Is JBB excited about it and is he going?

Answer: If I was a teenage girl in 1984 I guess I would be excited about it. It would take a lot for me to go to damn California. Other than the Yeah Yeah Yeahs and the Black Keys, I could give a fuck. I'm not going.

Question: Did Auburn just pull the 2nd best quarterback in the nation? - Matt, Nashville, TN

Answer: God damn it, yes. I ain't scared though. Diapers?

Question: Is sports' biggest closet homosexual, Reggie MIller, potentially coming out of retirement?

Answer: I fucking hope not. Seriously, isn't he like 47? If Jordan couldn't compete at 40, how the fuck is this choke artist going to do shit in the NBA?

Question: Is Jessica Simpson a tubby slut now?

Answer: To call her a "tubby slut" would be an understatement. This bitch has lost all control... Either that or Gomer's seed has been running wild in all the wrong places. With those tacky-ass clothes and all the weight, she looks like goatdiapers' aunt Bessie-Sue now after a 12 pack of Bud Heavy and a 5 gallon bucket of tater salad before she throws horse shoes and competes in the watermelon seed spitting contest at the Diapers family reunion. It goes without saying that I would now not poker.org.

Question: Will VH1 give anyone a T.V. show now?

Answer: Yes they will...



and T.O.'s face sums up how I feel about that.

Question: What occurs during one of B3KR's wet dreams?

Answer: Fortunately for you we recently developed the technology to record just such a thing. Here!

Question: Has Jerry Bail Bonds ever been photographed out on the town?

Answer: Yes, he has.


Don't let the girls fool you though, he'll leave with that younger dude.

Question: What is the gayest statement ever made on this website?

Answer: That award goes to The HIV with this gem:

"I have C.O.D. on Wii"

Excuse me while I wipe my eyes. Isn't that sweet, he has it on the wittle Wii. That way he can use his wittle Nintendo controller while he has a handfull of cock with the other hand.